Fools Rush In

by Uni Blogger and nonamedufus

WASHINGTON, DC (S&A) Fresh from his Heisman trophy win following a weekend of watching NFL matches, President Obama summoned all his experience in this area to intervene in one of the most memorable controversies to rock the world of professional football.

In an 11th hour call to NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell, Obama managed to negotiate a reversal of the NFL’s decisions to disallow Rush Limbaugh’s partnership in the group bidding to buy the St. Louis Rams.

rush_limbaughCaution: Listening may cause serious illness

A week ago Limbaugh, a renowned doctor-shopper and oxycontin connoisseur, commented that his football woes were the result of how Obama was running America.  “What is happening to the National Football League, what is about to happen to it, has already happened to Wall Street, has already happened to the automobile business,” claiming he had been done in by the media’s “blind hated”.

Obama, speaking to  FOX News’s Chris Wallace, in an interview that never aired – and according to the transcript obtained by S&A – told the so-called research arm of the Republican party, “I’ve decided to not only let this guy with a great football name back into the bidding process but I’m also appointing him as chairman of the Federal Reserve and making him the government’s point man with the auto industry.

Limbaugh’s plans for the St. Louis Rams include demoting all African American team members to water boys and Gatorade garcons while firing all the Mexicans who do that now.

Wide receiver today, water boy tomorrow?

Limbaugh, a conservative talk show host, is also bankrolling the reality television show “American Libel” starring the balloon boy family, the pilot of which was taped last week (no pun intended).  “I’d like to use balloon boy as my half-time show entertainment,” said Limbaugh.  “It’s time Americans knew that politicians don’t have a monopoly on hot air.”  Or radio hosts.


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6 responses to “Fools Rush In

  1. Just wanted to stop by and offer my congratulations on your newest blog…..salute!

  2. Congrats on the new blog! I usually shy away from the political satire, but this I can handle.
    I think I can use this when I am helping G-Man with his weekly current events assignments as well…thanks:)

  3. Paul

    The NFL decides who becomes an owner not the other way around.

    All this blowhard (Rush Hudson Limbaugh A.KA. Jeff Christie) has to offer is his money and his opinions, (which in my opinion are on the fringes of racism, one mans opinion). There are many more groups biding for the Rams, not just his group. Lets face it there are more men with money (Marshall Faulk) that will gladly fill the slot and the Rams will win or lose depending on how well they work as a team and not on whether or not Rush is an owner.

    As for Vick, well he is a player (he has talent not like you, Rush or I, unless you are a NFL player?) and he served his time and the NFL decided we live in the land of second chances, so why not (I personally don’t like it but, oh well). Life has never been fair (NEWS FLASH!)

    Now as to the “Free Speech” argument, I guess many of you like myself heard Rush on Thursday “Almost in tears”, priceless. But the last couple of days he now is in his normal ranting and will continue until someone surpasses him, “Free Speech” continues, so what is being stifled, it simply is not true, of course, you may not have a radio, so you might want to get one.

    PS – I am sure someone is working to put the tapes together maybe all you subscribers can help, since you are all about getting to the truth?

    PPS- Beauty Pageant Judge – Now I understand why he lost the weight, to find a new wife, creepy.

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