Hamilton’s Dundurn Castle First To Go
by Uni Blogger and nonamedufus
In the midst of a cross-country tour supposedly aimed at rallying the troops, as it were, and endearing the Royal Family to Canadians, Prince Charles shocked monarchists and anti-monarchists alike this morning. Canadians have come to expect shocking comments from the man who once said he wished he was his mistress’s tampon but today’s actions took HRH’s (His Royal Half-wit’s) looniness – and we’re not talking national symbol – to a whole new level.
“I really like your medals.”
Accompanied by his wife, Camilla Parker Bowels, the sedate and composed Duchess of Cornwall, the aging and ever-eager heir to the throne announced in the midst of a visit to Hamilton, Ontario’s Dundurn Castle that the monarchy was embarking on a massive repatriation scheme.
“It has become increasingly clear to mother and I that the vast majority of colonials have become disaffected with us,” said Prince floppy ears. Things came to a head a week or so ago when the Governor General declared herself Canada’s head of state. Well, I don’t mind telling you my ears were burning. Everybody knows I… erm, mother is the head of state. We have no choice but to take our castles and go home. Besides,” concluded the Prince, “we’re running out of places to play polo.”
The Prince then indicated that, in lieu of the millions of dollars in lost revenue normally paid by the Government of Canada to support the monarchy, the Royal Family would undertake a massive castle repatriation operation to replace this lost revenue.
The so-called castle-keep initiative will begin immediately with the transfer of Dundurn Castle and will include Casa Loma in Toronto, Hatley Castle in British Columbia, the hotel Chateau Frontenac in Quebec and the White Castle on the corner of Somerset and Bank streets in Ottawa.
“And perhaps 24 Sussex,” the Duchess of Corral, er Cornwall neighed in. “The Prime Minister told us only yesterday ‘Our home is your home'”.
The Duchess of Cornwall – picture of equine-imity.
The Prince made his abrupt announcement after a heated discussion with his wife over a long, heavy lunch. Observers speculate he may have been suffering a nasty bowels problem.
“One Dundurn deserves another.”
The gang at Theme Thursday will have many more interpretations of “castle” for your viewing pleasure Thursday, save for the keeners like me who couldn’t wait.