Willie and Frankie – Part 2

These are the continuing adventures of Willie and Frankie; two security guards on Parliament Hill, walking the deserted and darkened halls in the wake of the summer recess. Um, “adventures” might be too strong a word.

Frankie: Hey Willie!

Willie: Hi Frankie.

Frankie: Boy that was some show last week.

Willie: What show was that?

Frankie: The Canada Day celebrations.

Willie: Oh, yeah, those.

Frankie: They had fireworks.

Willie: Did you hear about that guy in Long Island…

Frankie: …that blew his arm off with fireworks?

Willie: Yeah, yeah, that’s the guy.  That’s gotta hurt.

Frankie: Eww, I hate when THAT happens.

Willie: Yeah, me too.  I guess you really have to hand it to him.

Frankie: I’ll bet he got a real bang for his buck with those fireworks.

Willie: Hey, did you know they had…

Frankie: …naked people running around the Hill on July 1st.

Willie: Eww, I hate when THAT happens.  It reminds me of…

Frankie: …the incident in the 80s with the speaker streaker?

Willie: Yeah, that’s it. But this time it was a group of naked people.

Frankie: Of course it was a group silly.  They’re called the Barenaked Ladies…and don’t worry, they kept their clothes on.

Willie: Oh, I hate when THAT happens.

Frankie: And the Queen was there, too.

Willie: But I thought Freddie Mercury was dead?

Frankie:  No, no, this Queen parades around in brightly coloured clothes and fancy hats and a matching purse.

Willie: Yeah, I know. Freddie Mercury.

Frankie: No, dummy, Queen Elizabeth.  She’s going to live forever.

Willie: Oh, yeah, I bet Charles just hates when THAT happens.

Frankie: Say that was some set-to…

Willie: …in downtown Toronto the other week?

Frankie: Yeah, yeah, that’s it.

Willie: What I don’t understand is why Gilles Duceppe was there?

Frankie: Gilles Duceppe?

Willie: Yeah, I heard on the news the streets were filled with the Bloc.

Frankie: Not the Bloc Quebecois you idiot, the Black Bloc.

Willie: Oh the party’s expanded it’s membership?

Frankie: No silly, they’re two different things.

Willie: Oh? And how are they different?

Frankie: Well one provokes divisions among democratic institutions and then disappears.

Willie: And how’s that different from the other one?

Frankie: Hmmm…the other one provokes divisions among democratic institutions and no matter what you try just won’t disappear.

Willie: Eww, I hate when THAT happens!

With apologies to Billy Crystal and Christopher Guest from Saturday Night Live 1985.



Filed under Bloc Quebecois, G8 and G20

4 responses to “Willie and Frankie – Part 2

  1. A worthy homage and funny as hell.

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