OTTAWA (S&A) – Health Canada has taken the unusual step of issuing an advisory to the public concerning the ever increasing problem of bullshit emitters.
The federal department’s advisory stated, “We have been bombarded with complaints from Canadians right across the country as politicians of all levels and parties have stepped up their emissions.”
Dr. Ivan Fecal of Health Canada says municipal elections across the country are known to poison the environment at about this time every couple of years. “However, complicating matters this year is the level of crap coming from certain provincial governments such as British Columbia, Ontario and Quebec.”
Stung by accusations recently that it was the most corrupt province in the country, Dr. Fecal says Quebec’s government has also been found to have the highest bullshit quotient across the country.
“Of course,” says the good doctor, “municipalities and provinces pale in comparison to the masters of bullshit emitters – federal politicians.”
Dr. Fecal says it was one thing when federal politicians were simply full of hot air but these emissions have lately gone right off the scale and represent a severe health hazard to Canadians everywhere.
Health Canada can’t force politicians’ withdrawal from the environment as they don’t fall under their purview. But they urged Canadians everywhere to put the environment first and since they had elected these stinkers only they had the wherewithal to recall them.